Wednesday, July 9, 2014

How to Deal with Living Across the Country

I am really close to my family.  I grew up with my grandparents five miles in either direction.  I spent summers with my grandmas shopping, listening to Frank Sinatra, and eating popsicles at the hair dresser.  More recently, my mom loved having us come home to visit to shoot guns, grill, and get into mischief in the country. 

I also like to consider myself a necessary thread to my friend groups.  I absolutely love planning wine nights, happy hours, and celebration parties.  I may not be a "hostess with the most-est", but I have lots of wine glasses and can bake a mean 9x9 pan of box brownies! 

It hit me pretty quickly when my Mom left us here in Texas (she flew back to Minnesota after driving down here with us for our move) that those things would not be happening, at least for a while.  You have to be pretty good friends before a wine and gossip night is comfortable, and we certainly won't be home for Christmas bingo this year. 

And then, as soon as you're away, it seems like EVERYTHING starts happening.  We've been gone less than five months and have already lost a grandparent, missed Mother and Father's Days, missed my maid of honor's engagement, etc.  And those things hurt.  Well, they hurt me, at least.  {Because I'm a big baby}   

Moving across the country with a month's notice for everyone was a CRAZY decision, but one we wanted to follow through with.  Do I regret it?  Absolutely not!  But do I get super bummed when I can't be around for a happy hour or baby shower?  Yes, yes, yes.  I guess that's the sacrifice you make for an adventure. 

As I've said before, I'm still playing life's game, and I think that change is sometimes the only way you can learn.  I've learned very quickly which friends I can't live without, how to stay in touch with family, and how much I'm absolutely in love with my husband. 

Being "alone" in Texas has been a challenging and fun experience so far.  It was the perfect time for us to break away from home and try something new, but at the same time, everyone is back home still going on with their lives and it is definitely hard for me to miss out!  Adventure and change always have downsides, and for me, it's the emotional part of not being there. 

So, my advice? 

*  Talk to someone from home at least once a week. 
*  Send snail mail for birthdays, engagements, or just a sweet hello :)
*  Pick a specific social media outlet to share pictures and fun stories were everyone can join in
*  Keep yourself busy!  Read, hike, shop, take trips.  ENJOY!
*  Plan a trip home a few months out so that you have something to look forward to
*  Remember why you moved in the first place and don't let "change" deter you

Props to all the people out there who leave home by themselves!  I could never imagine doing this without my amazing husband by my side.  Luckily for us, it is only making our relationship stronger and making memories that we will have together forever.  I'm lucky to have a strong man to get me through the tough days! 

I miss you, Minnesota!
(And all of you that come with it)

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