Friday, March 15, 2013

Loss

This may seem like a really strange post, but I just can't get it off my mind, so I'm going to share.

It was prompted by a coworker sharing the news that one of her 45 year old friends passed away in his sleep.  They had just been out the night before and he passed over night.  She just met up with his wife for brunch and she not surprisingly stated that she "never thought she would be a widow".

This floored me.  I cannot IMAGINE being me, at any age, without Mike.  And don't read this as "oh my gosh, she's such a sap/attached/whatever".  I mean:  what would I do in life without my husband??      I am lucky enough to share my life with him.  And some day we will share our lives with children.  This couple did not have kids, but I am terrified of the thought of being left a widow, with or without kids.  I know...this is really morbid.  But, as I said...I can't get it off my mind.

Mike also lost his mom last year.  And we worry a lot about his dad.  I can't imagine being married to the same person my whole life, watching them fight cancer, and sitting with them as they take their last breath.  I don't know that I've ever seen someone as strong as Mike's dad over the 9 months Carol was sick.  THAT is the definition of a husband, a strong man, a dad, someone I have the privilege of calling a father-in-law.  I also know my own husband shares a scary amount of characteristics with him.  Lucky me!

How would I get along without Mike?  He is my ROCK.  He listens to every thought I have, keeps me sane, and is the most caring and loving person I have ever met.  He takes care of me.  Every day, any time I need it, and no matter how much I whine.  Not to mention the fact that I wouldn't know how long to cook meat, how to clean the drains, I wouldn't be able to reach anything (hehe), I would have to pay for massages, and so many other little things that he does for me.

The superficial things, yes...I could get along without.  But I highly doubt I could ever find anyone as patient with me or who cares as much about me.  That includes my parents, in certain aspects.  Mike and I have had quite a ride and I don't regret anything, nor would I change it a bit.  Everything we have been through makes us US. 

Monday will be our 5 YEAR ANNIVERSARY.  I am so happy.  I love our story, our lives.  I want to live 'til the end, and please make me the first to go, because I would crumble without him!

The morals of my sap story:  love hard, make mistakes, don't give up, and CHERISH every single moment you have with your significant other.  You never know what life will hit you with, and I hope so hard that you and I never have to go it alone.  Or start over.

Don't second guess your (relationship) choices, because underneath it all, your heart is guiding you.  And you WILL end up where you are supposed to be.  I took my chances, and luckily ended up with an amazing guy to hold my hand through everything life has and will throw at me.

I can't imagine my life Any. Other. Way.  

From This:


To This:


I LOVE Being Mrs. Olson.

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